Some Ramblings (not so pleasant) About ReInvention

Rambling #1 -- Vday

Well, it's the day after Valentine's Day ... and I survived. Why do I say that? Well, I would love to see Valentine's Day (an invented holiday) either removed from the list or ReInvented to include just LOVE for all mankind. By making VDay (as I like to call it) about romance, it causes more pain than glory. Let me explain.

First, there shouldn't be only one day expressly set for people to honor their one and only love. I think that might best be done daily. And, what about spontaneously? When I was married, I loved it when my husband brought me flowers for no reason at all (although some of my friends assumed the worst .. that he maybe was guilty for something.)

Second, by suggesting that Vday is all about romance and love and sex ... it hurts many people who are dealing with 1) an unhappy relationship with a significant other and the hypocrisy of being honored that one day when many other days are lousy. 2) the loneliness of not having a significant other and feeling totally sad about that and not wanting it in your face. 3) the sadness of having lost their love, as in being widowed, divorced, etc.

If, on the other hand, we make Vday a day to love everyone ... then it's about acceptance, appreciation for our co-workers, our children, our friends. Yes, I know, there are cards for that and a slight inclination ... but truly, it's all about diamonds and flowers and dinner for two.

Let's reinvent that.

Rambling #2 -- Holidays
Let's also consider reinventing our relationship to honoring holidays in another way. In this day and age, a holiday is merely an excuse to 1) Not go to work (think of all the people that hate their jobs and actually WANT a day off to not work). 2) An opportunity for shopping and commercialism -- everyone is home today, let's sucker them for all they can or cannot afford to spend on their credit cards.

You see, many holidays could be seen as sacred and significant. Think of today .. we are celebrating and honoring Presidents Lincoln and Washington ... exactly HOW does that relate to shopping and spending money?

Here's where I date myself. When I was a kid... stores were actually ALL closed on Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Year's Day, Fourth of July, etc. The people who worked in retail actually got that day off and the reasons for the holidays were ever-present ... there were events to celebrate the value of the day, to be with loved ones. Now, probably only Christmas and Thanksgiving honor that.. maybe Easter.

I bet if you were to ask the typical woman/man on the street what today means and why it's a holiday, they couldn't tell you. That's sad.

Let's reinvent this.

Rambling #3 -- Reinvention is NOT to be feared.
Some people hear the word ReInvention and totally freak out. I actually have people say "I can't come to your reinvention workshop .. I'm way to scared." I wonder what they are scared about. I'm not going to suggest they prance naked through the streets. I'm just suggesting that each and everyone of us take a day (or whatever amount of time) to look at our lives and inquire into where we might "tweak it" .. where it's working, where it's not and how we might remedy that. Beyond that, I might suggest each one of us start becoming the person we are meant to be. One of my favorite sayings (yes, mine) is: Stop ripping off the world and be who you are meant to be.

ReInventing is about little steps .. it's not about doing everything completely different between this moment and the next. It's incremental. When we die, don't we want to feel like we reeealllly lived? I don't know about you .. but I'm not willing to settle for how it's always been (the status quo). I don't think you want to either.

Let's reinvent our relationship with ReInvention.

So. thanks for letting me ramble on this President's Day holiday. It's 11:30 in the morning, I'm still in my pajamas. Of course, I work at home, so I'm often in my pajamas half way through the day. I'm lucky -- don't have to get up and go to work each morning. If that annoys you .. then, hey, you too can have it if you're willing to give up the daily grind, take a risk, leap and reinvent.

Happy Holiday Monday

Stay the Same .. or Take ACTION .. The notion of Different!

On my website, at www.annfry.com I have the following quote: Wanting things to be different and doing what it takes to make things different are two different things!

We all wake up everyday, and during the course of that day, we have thoughts about how things are, how they're going, what's working, what's not ... in other words, we think many times a day about what we want to be different. We are seldom okay with how things are.

We can want things to be different -- we can wish and hope... but making things different .. now that is a much more challenging call. We want .. but do we have the guts, or will we take the time, or can we figure out the how, etc.

We hear people complaining about the government all the time ... criticizing and ranting and blaming. But, actually, what do they then DO to change what they don't like? It's all about ACTION. Ask yourself .. Am I someone who takes action? Or do I sit back and dream about it all, but do nothing? Tell the truth.

I might be the reinvention hotshot, but first and foremost, I'm a human being. I, like many of you, will wish and hope and then sit back and take NO action. Why? In my case, I get hooked into the "I don't know how." place. I spin my wheels, over think it, whine, doubt, etc. I ask everyone else what I need to do or should do. I weigh all the options ... ad nauseum. Eventually, I'll get sick and tired enough of not taking any action and will then do something.
For example. I've been needing to upgrade the content on my website for a long time. I've thought about it. I've printed out the old and carried it with me to make some upgrades, but yet, I didn't. Well, today, I had a burst of energy and just did it. It took about an hour to cut an paste and edit. My webmaster was working, so when I shot it all off to her, she got it done and up immediately. Wow! Weeks of NOT doing got done in an hour. That's ACTION.

Another thing to consider about not taking action ... we get to sit in a space of laziness, fear, aggravation. We get to be slugs. We get to be righteous about how no one is calling us, or using our services, etc. We blame others for our lack of work or whatever it might be. If the truth be known, however, it's US... our not doing anything.

We just get used to the status quo .. to staying where we are, doing the same old thing, whining and complaining about it. Sometimes, the circumstances can be overwhelming and we really don't know what to do OR it seems there's nothing to do.
NOTE: REInvention is NOT easy ... it's scary, demanding, challenging. It takes time and energy and perseverence and guts. It's not for the weak. Give yourself lots of nurturing attention and reassurance and pats on the back as you make progress. Take some down time, yell and scream and get frustrated.. and then, get back on the horse and keep riding forward.

The ACTION will lead to the change you want (eventually). Your life will be different AND it will take some getting used to ... AND it will be better than before if you acknowledge it and appreciate it.

So, stay where you are or take ACTION for things to be different. It's all up to you and you get to choose.
Happy ReInventing.

Shut Up and Take Action

(To listen to this blog rather than read it go here: http://tinyurl.com/2t3vgw )

Hi Everyone,
I think I want to rant a bit. There are so many things to reinvent in the world. If I were queen for a day... here's what I'd love to change:
- the whole political system in this country -- too much fighting and back stabbing
- the fact that people don't seem to understand one another -- the old "walk in someone else's shoes idea" ... if you're rich, spend a few days living like a poor person; and if you're poor, spend a few days living like a rich person. You'll see we all have issues.
- all the award shows ... could we just combine them into one long show ...?
- public fighting ... as on TV. I'm sick of the NBC issues. Do we need all these talk shows anyhow?
- lack of respect. I live in NYC, ride subways and buses. I can't tell you the number of young people that NEVER get up and give their seat to an older person who might need it. I can' even tell you how many younger people don't hold the door when they walk out, but rather just let it slam on the person behind them.
- news reporting... couldn't they just report what's happening without trying to destroy the person they're reporting about... people can make up their own minds.

Well, I could go on and on about my opinions. I won't. The point is ... there's much to change in the world AND we are mostly unable to pull those changes off. We can complain and whine; we can vote for change; we can write our editors, etc ... do what we can. There's a lot of frustration in trying to change big systems.

That being said .. we CAN effectly cause change in our own lives and maybe even those close to us. If we're sick and tired of how things are, we can work to shift our circumstances and have different experiences.

Stop saying "I can't." Stop thinking you can't. You can. If you're willing.

Much of my own personal change these days is circumstantial and sometimes feels out of my control. I have a scary health diagnosis, am getting treatment. It's an annoyance and I can't change that I have it. But, I can reinvent how I look at it all and deal with it. It IS up to me.

So, where in your life do you need to shut up and just take matters into your own hands to make some shifts and changes? I challenge you to take some action.

Share your thoughts, your actions... let us know what you're up to.
Reinvention is not overrated .. it's amazing and liberating and empowering.

Hang in there.
Ann

If Starbucks Can Do it ... You can do it!

Hi Everyone,
I've been on hiatus for a couple of weeks .. some travel, and some other business. I'm back and will be more regular.

ReInvention is such a hot word. I get a google alert everyday about reinvention and it's chock full of all sorts of articles. I read about movie characters being reinvented, companies reinventing, individuals blogging about how they're reinventing their lives. It's wonderful. So, I started wondering even more why the word is so popular and why so many people are re-examining their lives or the cultures of their companies, etc.

It's not rocket science. Our world is in a whirlwind of challenge and change. We have wars, we have devastating earthquakes and tornadoes, we have a very volatile economy and many unemployed people. There is no certainty at all .. in anything. Even the wealthy are having to sacrifice and watch more carefully. Nothing can be depended on. No one escapes the effects of all this turmoil.

So, change becomes the issue. If things aren't working, then do something different. Period. I'll continue to stress that all the time.

I just saw an interesting article on Starbucks. During the last couple of years, they realized that their popularity wasn't where it once was. They needed to go back to the drawing board and consider the quality of their products, create new foods and flavors, begin a social media blitz. They reinvented a great deal. (You can read the whole article here: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1955588,00.html)

So, what makes you any different than Starbucks. What do you have to stop doing or start doing that might make all the difference? Where would reinvention help you? Do you need to shift your attitude? Your career? Do you need to move locations? Do you need to commit to something? Take stock ... look around at your life.

I refer to our present life, at least for most of us, as remaining in the status quo. We do what we do, we don't spend too much time analyzing it, we DO spend time complaining about it. But, do we do what it takes to shift it into something we don't want to complain about?

I'll use myself here as an example. I speak professionally and I coach people. I've had different focuses over the years. Originally I started Humor University. I brought humor to the workplace (even wrote a book about it.) I continue to speak and to coach, but have transitioned quite a bit into this whole reinvention topic. I work with companies to shift their culture .. still bringing fun and happiness into the corporate environment. I work with individuals wanting to have some shift in their life. I run reinvention workshops. However, in this last one .. the workshops, I'm not attracting enough people. I hear people all around me saying how confused they are and how they want things to be different. But, when it comes to plunking down some cash to get into the workshop, they don't. So, I have to rewrite my brochures to be more compelling, or do more social media pushing or something. I have to get some advice on how to reinvent the reinvention workshop literature so that people are drawn to it. Maybe I'll even have to call it something different.

You see, it's about "tweaking." How do you tweak what you do all the time to continue to raise the bar? What does it take? If you're an entrepreneur you do that all the time. If you're a business, you do that all the time.

So, I ask you .. where in your life do you have to "tweak?" Where do you want to raise the bar? What do you want to be different? ANd, what's one step you can take today to begin to do that?

Happy ReInventing.
I welcome your comments.... especially on what you would call a reinvention workshop so that people would come.
Thanks, and happy weekend.
ann

Creating a ReInvention Vision

Okay, so in your head, maybe in the middle of the night, you say to yourself, "my life sort of sucks" or "I'm ready for something new and different" or "I think I'll move to Bali and start over." But, then you wake up in the morning and your day begins, like every other day and you silence the internal voice, suck it up and do what you always do.

Is this a familiar scenario? And, for how many years have you been doing this?

I get email all the time from people who dream quietly and sometimes even desperately, in their heads, but then squelch it and continue with the same old same old. Is it that they're idiots? NO, it's that they're scared, don't know how, feel overly obligated to others, dependent on the current lifestyle. You name it and the excuse is there.

More seriously, in some cases, they just don't even know that they are unhappy or that there are lurking desires. They're clueless, out of touch. They've buried their desires so down deep inside that they don't even remember them.

Wherever you are in this spectrum -- from KNOWING that you do want things to be different to CLUELESS ... here's an exercise you can take on. It works on the subconscious level and you don't even really have to think.

It's called Visioning or Creating a Vision Board. I'll take you through it one step at a time.
1. Get the following supplies and have them ready: a bunch of magazines, a pair of scissors, a glue stick, a poster board.
2. Give yourself permission to just go with it, not think and be playful.
3. Start to wonder / inquire inside: What would I love my life to look like in 2010?
4. Start going through the magazines. Everytime a picture grabs your attention, just rip it out (In addition to pictures, Words and phrases count)
5. Take all the pages you ripped out and start cutting out the portions of them that appeal to you -- photos, captions, words, etc.
6. Using the glue stick, start gluing them on the poster board. Be creative. You can cluster them (e.g. .. I have a section on my board related to business, another related to health, another to relationships) OR just put anything wherever you like the way it looks. THERE'S NO RIGHT OR WRONG WAY TO DO THIS.
7. You can further decorate it if you'd like ... not necessary.
8. Once you have enough on the board, feel inspired by it, then put it up someplace where you can see it regularly. (I know it might not add to the beautiful art you have.. but you'll find a place.)

Voila -- you're done. Then, many times, every day, as you walk by the board, you'll be reminded of what "lights you up" for the next year. It will start working on you.
It's a way cool idea.

The only reason not to do this is to stay in whatever rut you're in. However, at the end of the year, do not complain that you're in the same place.
The reasons to do this ... well .. .everything. It's based on the premise, that if you can see it .. you can create it. It's what is talked about in the Law of Attraction.
So, it's up to you. How do you want to create your year?

I hope you take this on and enjoy it.
Happy 2010.
Remember -- no resolutions .. just intention and action.
Cheers and Have fun,
Ann

ReInventing a New Year, New Decade, New You! Take YOU ON!

Happy 2010 ....
We are three days into this new year and decade. I've taken a bit of downtime and I've been reflecting about the last year, the last few years and what is to come. I'm energized and excited. I hope I can encourage you to feel that way too.

So, is it time to ReInvent a whole new relationship with yourself, your life, time, etc? Are you ready to take a LEAP? Are you tired of reacting rather than reinventing? If so, I've got some great questions to ask you. And, I invite you to answer them .. perhaps in a journal or on your computer in a word doc.
TAKE YOURSELF ON!

If you have any yearning for 2010 and the next decade to be DIFFERENT than the past, then do this for yourself. You DON'T have to settle!! Period. End of story.

First, some questions, then some resources.
Questions:
1. What are you thinking about as you begin this new year?
2. What are your reflections about the past year? How was it? (be honest)
3. What lessons did you learn this year?
4. What are your biggest challenges going into the new year?
5. What have you been putting off that now needs to happen? What are you waiting for?
6. How would you like to be better at your job or at work? What needs to be reinvented there?
7. If you were the best at what you do ... what would that look like?
8. What would you like to do with your one wild and crazy life? In other words, what have you always wanted to do, but haven't? Is this the year?
9. What are you grateful for?
10. What are your first 3 steps of action ... beginning NOW?

I hope you really will answer these questions and take yourself on. If not you, then who?
I know that change can be scary ... but much better to take it on willfully and by choice than to have it thrust upon you.

However, if change has been thrust upon you; if circumstances have intervened when you least expected them, then go here and listen to my most recent article called: Thriving After ...! http://tinyurl.com/2t3vgw I hope it excites you to move forward.

There are many resources for you to read and visit. Google the word "reinvention" and see what comes up. Go to http://www.selfgrowth.com and read fabulous articles. Stay tuned to my blog. I'll be challenging you regularly.

There are NO excuses NOT to take yourself on. I always ask myself, "if not now, when?" I absolutely refuse to settle for things being the same old, same old - the status quo. I invite myself to go further .. to go beyond who I know myself to be. And, I invite you to do the same.

Happy Week One of reinventing the new YOU, the new year and the new decade!
Please leave your comments on how you're doing. I'd love to hear from you.
Onward,
ann

P.S. DO NOT make resolutions -- you don't keep them, so they are insignificant. Just move forward with intention and action.

Out with the Old... In with the NEW

Happy almost New Year's Eve and Day,
I'm writing today to invite you to take a few moments and to do an assessment of 2009 and then set your intentions for 2010. Below will be a series of questions for you to ask yourself.
Take some time, take a pad of paper or a journal and write your responses. I promise you you'll feel centered and directed by this exercise.

If you're ready for things to be different ... if you're ready to ReInvent even a little bit... then take this on. I'll be checking back with you soon AND I invite you to let me see some of your responses.
Stay tuned, there are some FREE teleclasses coming just after the NEW YEAR just to help you get jump-started.

So here goes ... happy assessing:

New Year Assessment and Planning Instrument – 2010

(Take out a journal, carve out about an hour, reflect and write … get a jump start on 2010)

I. What are you thinking as you begin this new year?

II. What are your reflections about the past year? How was it?

III. What lessons did you learn this year? What served you well, or showed you a few less pleasant aspects of yourself?

IV. What are your biggest challenges for the new year?

V. Where do you want to be at this time next year?

VI. What have you been putting off that now needs to happen?

VII. As we look at the various aspects of your life, let’s do a little inventory of each – list them all (e.g. health, fitness, work, relationships, finances, etc.) what’s working and what’s not?

VIII. How would you like to be better at your job?

IX. If you were “the best” at what you do, what would that look like?

X. Time to “fantasize” just a bit…. What would you like to do with your one wild and crazy life? In other words – what have you always wanted to do…. But haven’t? Might it be time?

XI. What are you grateful for? Make a list … NOW.

XII. So, where will you start as the calendar turns to this new year? What are your first steps? What’s your direction?

Congratulations! You’re well on your way to making 2010 your best ever year!!

ReInvent From the Inside Out

Good morning,
It's 2 days and counting down til Christmas and a week and two days til New Year's Day. While many are hustling and bustling and doing the same old, same old of holiday craziness, others are going inward, being still, smiling, laughing and taking the season in stride. What's your approach?

Let's start with Christmas. Whether you celebrate Dec. 25th or not, you're in the midst of it. Yesterday, I was at a lunch meeting near Rockefeller Center (NYC) and then had to walk 8 blocks to my next destination .. walked right along 5th Avenue. If you know NY, you know that's a very busy street at all times, but during Christmas, it's really hustle and bustle. People are spending money (that they might not have) at Saks, Henri Bendel's, Tiffany's, etc. Walking along the street filled with many tourists (who walk 4 and more across, blocking the sidewalk) carrying big shopping bags is a challenge. Then, crossing at the corners (with heaps of piled snow) adds to the walking challenge. Sometimes it's easy to get frustrated. But, I just smiled, walked around people when I could, took my time and enjoyed the sunshine, brisk wind, and the opportunity to just observe people. I made it stress-free. It was awesome. I took a few moments to look at the beautiful shop windows, when I could get close enough to see them.

So, I ask you ... how can you still "reinvent" your relationship with Dec. 25th -- starting now? Can you be peaceful, knowing you'll get it all done? Can you be peaceful, knowing it will come around and maybe everything won't be done? Can you take a few minutes, several times a day, to be quiet within and renew yourself? And, then, ON Dec. 25th, amidst all the family to-do's, the meals to be cooked, can you approach it a way that serves you well. Can you reinvent within so that what occurs on the outside works better?

Then, moving into the week after Christmas, can you take time to approach the new year in a new way? Can you agree to take stock of your 2009, look at what worked and what didn't and set a plan for 2010 that serves you best? DON'T make resolutions -- you know you never keep them. But, DO set some intentions for how you'd like the year to be. Take plenty of quiet time to reflect.
Give yourself the gift of reinventing -- doing some new and different things.

I wish you a glorious Dec. 25th ... and will continue this discussion with you during the interim week.

Sincerely,
Ann
The REInvention Hotshot

Let's REInvent the Holidays

Good Sunday morning,
It is December 20th, 5 days until Christmas and 12 days until New Year's Day. It is, for many of you, a very busy time. And, if you live along the East coast, there's the added pressure of difficult weather. I live in NYC and outside today it is white, white, white and shivering cold. We got hit with the first snow of the year and boy did it snow. It's beautiful out there AND it's a nightmare for people in adjoining states where they actually have to drive to the mall to shop. Retailers are freaking out, people are anxious about getting it all done.

Summary: All in all, everyone is worried, trying to figure it all out, wondering if it will all turn out, fearful about their pocketbooks (whether they are retailers or consumers.) Not a good feeling.

Every year at holiday time, it's the same thing. It's commercial and it seems to be a moral imperative to spend a lot of time and money having the perfect holiday -- gifts, food, entertaining and more. I lived that life for many, many years. Although I must admit ... I'm not such a perfectionist that I drove myself crazy with it having to be absolutely the best set table, decorations, guest list, etc. I did, however, do the gift-buying, food preparation, etc. But, not anymore. I don't have to anymore. I have one child (he is 31), I live alone at this point in my life. I am much more interested in experiences then in purchases. I give in other ways.

However, if you are still on that treadmill -- you have children waiting for Santa, you're a company deciding how to celebrate with your employees, etc., then I know you're in that place, yes, 5 days out, of having to get it all done.

So, how can you REINVENT the next five days and make it manageable? What can you create for yourself and your family and others that will provide an amazing experience of holiday cheer, tempered with NOT overspending, over-committing, etc? How can you create an attitude of gratitude and appreciation and awe and wonder for yourself and others? In other words, how can you do it all differently?

One thing you can do is download my FREE holiday e-book called Holiday Management 101: 35 Ways to Endure the Madness and Laugh Your Way Through the Holidays. There might be a couple of fun ideas for you there. Go to: http://www.humoru.com and click on the gift icon.
Another thing you can do is just to CHOOSE to make these next free days stress-free. Every new behavior begins with a declaration. So choose "peace" instead of stress or whatever words you might use.

The point: Have wonderful holidays. ReInvent your relationship about HOW you do the rest of the holiday week.
People often fear "reinvention." They think it means throwing their entire life up for grabs. I try to convince us that everytime we do even one thing differently, we ARE reinventing. So relax.

That's it for today. Thanks for reading ... and pass this on to your friends.
Thanks,
Ann